Deadly Nightshade by Sem Thornwood

Chapter 10

Isabella

I woke up warm and cozy. I was not wrapped with my sheets like other times. I was wrapped with a hard-muscled body. So many and very hard muscles, but still, I was very comfortable. It was the best sleep I had since I found out about Mom’s illness.

All the things I told myself couldn’t make me feel better. The fact that Mom was not suffering anymore and was somewhere better now didn’t do anything to ease my pain. Sleeping with Alessio, on the other hand, did not only that, but it also made me feel happy. Maybe I was an asshole to feel happy after Mom’s death, but I couldn’t help it.

She’d want me to be happy. She wanted me to do whatever my heart wished, didn’t she? Alessio was what my heart wished for since I could remember.

I try to wiggle out of his hold to look up at his face. It was genuinely hard since he was holding me so tight to him. Yet, I manage to pull back enough to look at him. My hand that was wrapped around his middle made a little journey through his very naked chest to his and finally stopped on his cheek, where I slowly brushed my thumb over his cheekbone. God, he was beautiful.

He was also the guy who could make me forget all the pain and remember all the joy in the world. But he was truly beautiful as well, and those qualities being together didn’t hurt one bit.

When his eyes flutter open, I didn’t know how long I was watching him, but I didn’t act like I wasn’t. I watched him waking up and smiling at me sleepily. “Good morning, Sweetheart.”

I did get butterflies every time he called me Sweetheart. Even though he was calling me that for years. That warm hold around my heart never faltered. He was meant to be my everything. He was my savior. I wanted to kiss him.

So, I did it.

Damned the morning breath.

I wrapped my fingers around his neck and pulled him to me. Turns out he was more than willing. I kissed his bottom lip. Then I kissed his top lip. Then I didn’t hold back. He let me choose the pace, so I was the one who deepened the kiss. I captured his bottom lip and dive into his mouth with my tongue almost hungrily. When our tongues met, I could feel it all the way down, between my legs. Weird how the human body works.

One of his arms was wrapped around my waist, and the other held the back of my head, softly brushing my curls. He didn’t pull me too much, though. He was letting me lead the whole thing. Normally I liked when he was in the lead, but at this moment, it felt good. Being in control of something made me feel powerful and not like a helpless little kid who just lost her mother.

Since I wanted him closer, I decided to pull him to me. I wanted all of his body close to mine. Our legs were still tangled, so I wrapped them around his and pulled him to me. Only something I was not excepting happened. The movement made something hard to dig into my thigh. A groan escaped from Alessio’s mouth, and I jumped away from him.

My eyes were wide, and when he saw that, his face filled with worry. Shit, why did I even react like this? I was in practically nothing sleeping in his arms and kissing him like he was my last meal. Of course, he was hard. I did feel his erection before when we kissed. I guess being in bed made it kind of… awkward.

He rolled away from me. “Shit, I am sorry.”

I shook my head like crazy. “No, really no reason to apologize.” After all, his touch made me wet downtown too. “I was just startled.”

“Of course, you are. I should have controlled it.” Could he really do that?

He made a move to get off the bed, but I quickly reached him. I was stupid. Maybe I acted like a kid. I didn’t want him to see me as a kid. I was actually happy that he was hard for me. I didn’t want to ruin it just because he caught me off guard.

I pulled him to me even he resisted. That broke my heart just a little bit, but since I knew he was being considerate, I just pushed the hurt away. I whispered to his swollen lips, “I don’t want you to control it.”

His eyes filled with lust. Okay, maybe that sounded a little too eager. I just wanted him close, and I wanted him to feel comfortable with me. I was not trying to seduce him to fuck me. So, I put a small kiss on his lips and smiled. “Let's have breakfast. I am starving.”

He didn’t seem like he minded me backing off. He chuckled. “First, you need to go back to your room. Mia won't say anything, but Verona and Valerio could be a little mouthy.

“Right,” I said. I forgot I was in Alessio’s room. That would look so bad. Even us sleeping together was so inappropriate, and I was here saying things that can seem like I wanted to have sex with him.

Actually, I did want to have sex with Alessio. My body was begging for it. I was supposed to stay a virgin until marriage, but that was not even the thing that stopped me. It was just not the right time. Once, I read people often had sex after a funeral as a coping mechanism, but that was not what I wanted.

First of all, I was still healing, and even though I kissed him angrily, I didn’t think I could have sex for the first time when I was still hurting. Also, I didn’t want Alessio as a coping mechanism. When I sleep with Alessio, it was not going to be because I want to forget my pain. It was going to be because I want him. It was going to be because he is the only person who can create butterflies in me.

Shit, this is so wrong. I didn’t even say “if,” I said, “when.” I was supposed to have sex for the first time on my wedding night. I cannot fantasize about getting it on with Alessio.

“Bella, what is wrong?” Alessio pulled me from my thoughts. Oh, I must have looked lustful and horrified at the same time. A weird look, no doubt.

I shook my head again and pressed one last kiss to his lips. “Nothing. I should go so I can dress up for breakfast.”

He got out of bed really quick. “Let me check the hallway.”

I tried the straighten my clothes and brushed my hair with my fingers briefly. I must have looked crazy right now. After Alessio peeked out of the door, he turned to me, and his expression made me sure I looked crazy. He looked at me in a sweet way, but he was visibly holding back a laugh.

“What?” I asked, still trying to make my hair look okay.

Alessio’s eyes lingered on my lips. “Put on a chapstick or something before going downstairs. Your lips are too swollen.”

I touched my lips briefly. “Shit.”

He caught my hand and pulled me to him and the door. He smiled at me with amusement and whispered, “You never looked more beautiful.”

Butterflies set free, tingles spread between my legs, and my heart warmed so much that it almost melted. “I don’t believe you.”

“Oh, but I am telling the truth, Sweetheart.” He was. His eyes didn’t leave a place for doubt.

I couldn’t hold back a smile. I pushed him away playfully. “I should go.”

He didn’t answer, but he let go of me so I can leave. After he peeked out once more, I stepped into the hallway but turned back to him once I was out. “Can I want something?” I asked, knowing my cheeks must be red. He only nodded, so I asked. “Can you come to my room tonight so we can sleep together again? I can’t sleep alone. It is easier for you to go back.”

His eyes sparkled with something sweet. Love? A girl can hope. He looked left and right before kissing my forehead. “Of course. I’ll come every night you want me to.”

“Thanks,” I said with still red cheeks and went to my room. He was going to stay with me every night I want him to. Maybe I should have told him I want him every night until I die.