All the Wrong Choices by C.A. Harms

Chapter Thirty-Four

Danielle

"You are here,"Addison lays on the bed next to me with her head resting on the pillow beside my own. Both of us turned on our sides, talking in low voices. "That's a good thing because where you were was a mistake."

I laugh, or at least I attempt to. It's been far too long since I've felt joy, and it's strange to be happy.

"I still can't believe he showed up at my parents' house." It was the last place I'd expected anyone to show up uninvited. Especially Jonah after the way we left things.

"He came unglued when he found out you were there."

"I thought he and Matthew were going to tackle each other when we tried to leave."

"Do tell," she wiggles her body closer, her eyes full of excitement.

"It was a short-lived battle of words, one that Jonah won." I'm the guy who’s going to marry Dani one day. I still can't believe he said those words, but I've convinced myself it was just for show. After the way I treated him, the things I put him through, how can he trust me now?

"What are you thinking?" I hadn't realized my thoughts had drifted off until I reconnected with Addison. No longer smiling, but now appearing concerned. "I don't like this version of you. It scares me."

"I don't like me either right now," I confess, "but I'll get there, I promise. I'm my own worst enemy." I yawn, feeling myself relaxing into the warm cozy covers a little more. I'll admit Jonah's bed is the most comfortable bed, but maybe it's because it smells like him.

"Do you remember the day when you were at my place, and you were upset because you'd just left your parents? I think it was a dinner or something, and you went out onto my back balcony because you needed a little time." I nod, knowing the very night she's talking about. "He confessed to me that night he'd fallen for you."

I close my eyes feeling an emotional response for the first time in days.

"Let him love you, Dani," a burning sensation fills my chest. "He wants to, he's wanted to for so long now, but he's been afraid to because you said it wasn’t what you wanted." It's because I told him it was all I was capable of. "I think we both know what you need is to have a man in your life who puts you first for a change. Someone to love you even when you feel like they shouldn't, that's Jonah. I can see the way he looks at you. From the beginning, it's been that way. Like he's in a trance whenever you are near. Stop sabotaging your happiness."

All I can do is nod because I know she's right, but her words are affecting me much more than I expected.

"It's time to let go of all the ugly, wouldn't you say?"

"Yes," it has consumed me for far too long. And it has also almost cost me not only my best friends but also the one man I believe is the only man who's truly loved me.

I keep my eyes closed, but it doesn't keep the tears from falling. It feels good just to let everything flow through me and to feel every emotion. To accept what I'm going through and stop fighting it.

I relax when I feel Addi start to rub my arm. Pushing the hair back from my face, I fade more and more until I've fallen asleep, feeling a little less weight pressing down around me.